The Importance of Parents As Role Models
As early as infancy, children model their behaviors on the adults surrounding them. Parents who take advantage of this position as their child’s earliest influence and mentor ensure their child learns the values and life skills to lead a successful life.
Papa Don’t Preach
Children respond much better to social cues than sermons. Abstract concepts like respect often confuse young children. Rather than telling your child to behave courteously, show her courtesy in your day-to-day interactions with others. This approach provides more success than offering rewards or using fear to coerce good conduct.
Watch the signals you send. Your child may interpret your angry response to his misbehavior as a sudden loss of love. Instead of shouting at your child when he colors on the wall, take a deep breath, crouch down to eye-level, and calmly state, “Daddy is upset because you colored on the wall. We don’t color on the wall.”
Children learn more from these kinds of calmly spoken statements than they do screamed rhetorical questions. Help your child understand yelling and fighting will not solve problems. Peaceful interaction encourages compromise.
Remember to follow the rules you set. Don’t try to sneak a snack in front of the television if the household rule is no food in the living room. Your child will see you (as they inevitably do) and will question why Daddy can break the rules. Expect discord if this occurs. If everyone follows the household rules, there will be no confusion.
Mama Knows Best
Mothers take heart. In a study of 370 girls ranging in age from 12 to 18, forty-six percent chose their mothers as their best source of information. Keeping this in mind, mothers must maintain open lines of communication. Make sure your child is comfortable coming to you with any question, even the embarrassing ones. This is one of the best ways to impart your morals and values to your children.
In the same study, nearly half of all the girls questioned named their mothers as the prime example inner beauty. For the mother concerned her daughter may develop a skewed body image from popular media, this is reassuring news. Display a positive body image and teach your daughter to value herself. Emphasize personal accomplishment over looks to discourage low self-esteem.
Do As I Do
With childhood obesity rates skyrocketing, parents must model healthy eating behaviors at home. Studies indicate adolescents whose parents drink one soda a day are likely to consume fast food at least once a day. On the other hand, children who observe their parents eating five servings of fruits and vegetables every day are much more likely to make healthy eating choices when on their own.
Parents should make fitness a priority. Find a way to squeeze exercise into your weekly schedule and make sure to involve your children. A simple option might be a family walk around the neighborhood or a trip to a nearby park for a game of soccer or baseball. For the more ambitious, purchase a family pass to the local gym.
Involve your children in the weekly shopping trip. Have them suggest meals for the menu and discuss the nutritional values of each one. Take them shopping and introduce them to new ingredients. Let them help in the preparations of meals. In this way, you ensure your child leaves your home with knowledge required to prepare healthy meals and stay fit.
Money, Money, Money
Parents interested in teaching their children about money should start early. Help your child develop lifelong financial responsibility through a combination of hands-on learning and workbooks. Several prominent financial experts offer books aimed at the teen or adolescent audience. Use these books as guides in your money management lessons. Encourage saving and teach the value of day’s work.
If your own financial house is in disarray, challenge yourself to make it better. Include your children in the family’s goals and offer age appropriate information. Your child will learn mistakes are simply mistakes and can be rectified with hard work and determination.
Read Between the Lines
With the changing global economy, secondary degrees are quickly becoming requirements for employment success. Research clearly indicates parents involved in their child’s education raise children successful in academics. From an early age, encourage a love of literature by reading to your child. When your child starts school, meet with his teachers regularly and ask questions. Be available to your child while he does his homework. Help him review homework and study for tests.
Encourage your child to set short-term and long-term goals. In the short-term, your child might want to make an “A” on his next math exam. In the long-term, your child may want to maintain a 4.0 average during the current school year. By teaching your child to set and reach goals, you set him up for success in college when his academic performance will depend solely on his ability to work independently.
The Most Important Influence
Our behavior as parents guides the behavior of our children in all aspects of life, including relationships, employment, education, health and even finances. This position as the most important role model in a child’s life begins in the earliest days of infancy and continues well into adulthood. The hard work of modeling these behaviors seems a small price to pay when it ensures the success of one’s child.